Guess the Character by the Quote - The Office

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Across
  1. 2. “Last year, Creed asked me how to set up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed’s brain, I opened up a Word document on his computer and put an address at the top. I’ve read some of it. Even for the internet, it’s… pretty shocking.”
  2. 3. "If you would have seen the look he gave me, he wanted to rock more than just my vote."
  3. 6. "The point is to get from point A to point B as creatively as possible, so technically they are doing parkour as long as point A is delusion and point B is the hospital."
  4. 10. "It's kind of a good news, bad news situation. The bad news is we're not doing very well, so we really had to starve ourselves this whole week. But the good news is that all the other branches are doing just as bad as we are. So corporate upped the prize to 5 days. So if we stay fat long enough, we may actually get a whole month off."
  5. 11. "I normally don’t enjoy making people laugh."
  6. 12. "I am fast. To give you a reference point I am somewhere between a snake and a mongoose… And a panther."
  7. 13. "Break me off a piece of that...fancy feast."
  8. 15. "The people I respect, heroes of mine, would be Bob Hope...Um...Abraham Lincoln, definitely. Bono. Uh, and probably God, would be the fourth one."
  9. 18. "I want to be wine and dined and sixty-nined."
Down
  1. 1. "Are you wearing lady clothes?"
  2. 4. "I wonder what people like about me. Probably my jugs."
  3. 5. "I do not like pregnant women in my workspace. They’re always complaining. I have varicose veins, too. I have swollen ankles. I’m constantly hungry. Do you think my nipples don’t get sore too?"
  4. 7. "I suggested we flip a coin, but Angela said she doesn't like to gamble."
  5. 8. "Ultimatums are key. Basically nobody does anything for me anymore unless I threaten to kill myself."
  6. 9. "What has two thumbs and likes to bone your mom? This guy!"
  7. 14. "If I was 22, and I had lots of time to have lots of children, then sure, let's let Michael have a shot at one of 'em. But, honestly, I need to make this one count."
  8. 16. "I’ve been involved in a number of cults, both a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower, but you make more money as a leader."
  9. 17. "I have six roommates, which are better than friends because they have to give you one month's notice before they leave."