Rock and Roll Trivia

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Across
  1. 2. Place where you pay $12 for a beer that tastes like it was filtered through a gym sock.
  2. 3. Musical wizard who can make terrible singers sound good and good singers sound like they're from another planet.
  3. 4. Four lads from Liverpool who made teenage girls scream so loud that seismologists thought there were earthquakes at their concerts.
  4. 6. Ritual where musicians spend three hours making sure everything sounds perfect, then change it completely during the show.
  5. 8. When musicians pretend they're done but everyone knows they're hiding behind the curtain like musical peek-a-boo.
  6. 13. Secret scroll that determines whether fans go home happy or start angry petition drives on social media.
  7. 14. Magical stick that makes shower singers believe they're ready for Madison Square Garden.
  8. 16. Dance move that looks like someone's having an argument with their own neck.
  9. 18. Electronic device that transforms quiet noodling into neighborhood-evacuating sonic warfare.
  10. 19. Six-stringed wooden weapon of mass seduction that turns ordinary humans into leather-pant-wearing demigods.
  11. 20. Plural form of devoted fans who treat concert schedules like migration patterns.
  12. 22. When your equipment decides to have its own temper tantrum and sounds like a banshee stubbing its toe.
  13. 23. Giant flashlight that makes performers feel like they're being interrogated by aliens who really dig their music.
  14. 24. Moment when one band member shows off while the others stand around looking supportive but secretly counting money.
  15. 25. Someone whose romantic strategy involves following tour buses like a musical stalker with backstage passes.
Down
  1. 1. Person sitting behind a fortress of circular targets, hitting them with sticks like the world's most musical whack-a-mole game.
  2. 3. Shiny participation trophy that costs more than most people's houses and makes musicians feel like they've conquered the world.
  3. 4. Magical realm where normal rules don't apply and Where's Waldo could hide indefinitely among the tie-dye shirts.
  4. 5. Organized chaos where strangers express their love of music by accidentally elbowing each other in the ribs.
  5. 7. This guy made hip gyrations so scandalous that TV cameras only showed him from the waist up, like some kind of musical centaur.
  6. 9. Elevated platform where normal people transform into gods and promptly forget the lyrics to their own songs.
  7. 10. Soundproof bunker where musicians go to argue about whether that cymbal crash happened on the right beat.
  8. 11. The only acceptable way to hit things repeatedly while people cheer you on instead of calling the police.
  9. 12. Human karaoke machine with the lung capacity of a whale and the ego to match.
  10. 14. Person who turns creative chaos into profitable chaos while taking a percentage of everyone's dreams.
  11. 15. Musician who provides the heartbeat of the band but gets about as much attention as furniture.
  12. 17. Musical phrase so catchy it gets stuck in your head like auditory superglue for the next three weeks.
  13. 21. Unsung hero who can lift amplifiers heavier than small cars but somehow can't figure out how to untangle microphone cables.