Chapter 4

6. unconscious techniques that function to protect individuals from anxiety and to minimize emotional hurt.
7. short typewritten messages sent via a cell phone that are used to “commence, advance, and maintain” interpersonal relationships.
9. message in which the verbal and nonverbal behaviors match.
10. statement that blames or criticizes the listener and often results in increasing negative feelings and behavior in the relationship.
12. in communication, going out on different limbs of an issue rather than staying focused on the issue.
13. a solution to a conflict in which neither partner benefits.
17. the “message about the message,” using gestures, eye contact, body posture, tone, volume, and rapidity of speech.
19. the simultaneous denial of and avoidance of dealing with a problem.
20. to show interest without serious intent.
21. both partners are aware that one of them chose not to engage in a negative comment.
22. the cognitive justification for one’s own behavior that unconsciously conceals one’s true motives.
23. sending erotic text and photo images via a cell phone.
24. paraphrasing or restating what the person has said to you while being sensitive to what the partner is feeling.
25. outcome of a conflict in which one partner wins and the other loses.
26. question that allows for a one-word answer and does not elicit much information.

1. statements which focus on the feelings and thoughts of the communicator without making a judgment on others.
2. shifting one’s feelings, thoughts, or behaviors from the person who evokes them onto someone else.
3. attributing one’s own thoughts, feelings, and desires to someone else while avoiding recognition that these are one’s own thoughts, feelings, and desires.
4. suggesting as many alternatives as possible without evaluating them.
5. question which elicits a lot of information.
8. the process of exchanging information and feelings between two or more people.
11. the ability to impose one’s will on the partner and to avoid being influenced by the partner.
14. expecting a close other’s indulgence when one behaves inappropriately.
15. the context in which the perceptions or behavior of one person are in contrast to or interfere with the other.
16. relationship in which conflict is resolved so that each partner derives benefits from the resolution.
18. being who one is and saying what one feels.