Across
- 1. Marketing scientist you might not have heard of, who influences brands you have, with his research (full name).
- 4. Correctly called out the entire marketing industry for leaning heavily to the left politically and isolating important customers (last name).
- 9. Infamous brand designer behind Pepsi and Tropicana’s convoluted redesigns (full name).
- 11. The “Ad Contrarian.” Read his books for a good laugh (full name).
- 13. Marketing scientist with a nocturnal bird on her book that every brand designer should read, yet none of them have (last name).
- 17. Claimed “love” is all brands need. Author of “Love Marks.”
- 19. Trucker-hat-clad Self-help guru for designers (fullname).
- 20. Everything is “bollocks” to this marketer (last name).
Down
- 2. Bullshit Philosopher. Literally (full name).
- 3. Millennial-hater with a smooth tongue (last name).
- 5. Marketing bro with a Napoleon complex (last name).
- 6. Inspired an influx of newsletter popups no one clicks and everyone closes as soon as possible (full name).
- 7. Branding guru who might propose Band-Aid brand is a “guide” to “heroes” (customers) in their fight against the “villains” in their lives (paper cuts, skinned knees, generic store-brand bandages, blood, etc.). Full name.
- 8. Claimed the “iPhone will fail” because it wasn’t an example of “true innovation” and launched a fund to invest in the stock market based on his theory of “disruption” that was shut down after performing 15% below average market expectations. Remarkably still idolized today by tech bros (full name).
- 10. Creator of the pyramid brand strategists dig up out of their college psychology textbooks to pretend they can psychoanalyze consumers (full name).
- 12. Convinced readers to quiet quit their jobs before “quiet quitting” was a thing. Mostly using drop shipping which contributed to its share of higher unemployment rates (full name).
- 14. Psychologist who pioneered putting people into boxes and inspired brand strategists to do the same with brands (full name).
- 15. “Toxic” copywriter who rightfully criticizes brand purpose (last name).
- 16. Likes alliteration using the letter “z,” avoids blank spaces, and does handstands (last name).
- 18. Proposed brands would die if they didn’t do one thing (last name); type of fish.