Happy 25th birthday, Larissa!

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Across
  1. 3. a mysterious illness circulating in munger that masquerades as covid
  2. 5. the number of years we have known each other (crazy!)
  3. 8. a satellite company, a type of soap, and a path with only one correct direction
  4. 9. all _____s look the same to me
  5. 11. the percentage of times that saketh has beaten larissa at apple watch fitness competitions
  6. 14. a scientific genius and a film unsuitable for children like saketh
  7. 15. a connoisseur of short stories
  8. 16. a world famous hairdresser who had a high-profile fall from grace after a delayed but stinging rebuke from a former client
  9. 18. donald trump's former wife and a sociologist who networks with lawyers
Down
  1. 1. iconic crossword answer that sounds funny
  2. 2. you have to hinge saketh, HINGE
  3. 4. iconic crossword answer
  4. 6. larissa's biggest character flaw
  5. 7. a thicket of greenery and an obsession with punctuation
  6. 10. larissa's murder weapon
  7. 12. our only mutual friend from illinois
  8. 13. taking a seat for serious business and a suboptimal way to begin a race
  9. 17. larissa's former alter ego