Across
- 3. A multi-layered household saga where a pristine white couch is the ultimate enemy, Phils-osophy is a self-published philosophy guide, and a stray pigeon once caused total domestic meltdown.
- 5. A corporate profile where a local serial killer remains at large under the moniker "The Scranton Strangler," a homemade film titled Threat Level Midnight takes a decade to produce, and a minor character famously spills an entire giant pot of chili on the carpet.
- 8. The ultimate destination where you are tortuously forced to listen to nothing but the spoken-word version of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and the absolute smartest person alive is a completely baked Canadian guy named Doug.
- 10. The definitive chronicle of Human Beings, a delta-cube secret society, a lost purple pen, and the devastating emotional fallout of a blanket fort civil war.
Down
- 1. An ongoing study of severe moral degradation featuring milk-steak boiled over hard, an underground sport called Chardee MacDennis, and the chaotic production of a rock-opera titled The Nightman Cometh.
- 2. A massive framework of romantic misdirection featuring an elusive mythical beast called the Cockamouse, a strict adherence to the Bro Code, and an ongoing, terrifying threat of a random open-handed facial strike.
- 4. A generational saga detailing a highly suspicious maritime retirement community called Sudden Valley, a severe phobia of loose seals, and an acoustic sad-walk song lifted straight from Charlie Brown.
- 6. A workplace dynamic where a mysterious black box allegedly contains the entirety of the internet, a goth named Richmond lives in the server closet, and a tragic fire at a Sea Parks arena remains unexplained.
- 7. A corporate media satire fueled by a hyper-specific demand for night cheese, an incredibly bizarre functional workspace product called the Trivection Oven, and the production of a fictional film titled Rural Juror.
- 9. A civic-minded masterpiece centered around a deeply feared local celebrity miniature horse, a total bureaucratic reliance on the Cones of Dunshire, and a horrific daily epidemiological threat known as "The Pit."