Pour me another glass of Portmanteu, please.

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Across
  1. 3. Canadian buying power option
  2. 5. the now failing company online company
  3. 7. we looked at it from an unusual angle
  4. 8. you'd be this if you FoT'd illegally
  5. 11. nickname of HH bar pre-Winter League
  6. 12. your most expensive meal in Asia [2 words]
  7. 14. there's tons of this in China
  8. 17. Ma's name for 2/1 activity
  9. 18. let's dress up like furries?
  10. 20. Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
  11. 21. a drink with no proof
  12. 23. name of my now defunct bar in PDX [1 word]
  13. 24. name of my most recent co-ed ultimate team
  14. 26. what gym teachers never want to be accused of being
  15. 28. Magic School Bus, Sesame Street, Dora the Explorer are examples
  16. 29. nothing like the smell of this in the morning
  17. 30. name of my co-ed team I played on in MT
  18. 33. my haircut is named after him
  19. 34. a guy's wallet might go here?
Down
  1. 1. animal from the south that I desperately want, and already have a name picked out [Ruby]
  2. 2. holiday food abomination
  3. 3. the Packers are the only team in NFL to do this
  4. 4. first movie we watched was one of these
  5. 6. Blacula and Shaft are these
  6. 9. when I'm this, I'm my grumpiest self
  7. 10. how to find homosexuals
  8. 13. man love
  9. 15. late breakfast
  10. 16. crucial ingredient in Caesar [the drink]
  11. 17. Beyonce is described as this
  12. 19. holiday food abomination
  13. 22. Taco Bell gives you this for pintos and cheese
  14. 25. Rush Limbaugh calls women this sometimes
  15. 27. we burn more than average amounts of calories this way
  16. 31. you decline to do this
  17. 32. normal existence is one
  18. 33. what our mobile communication is devolving into