Satire Issue

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Across
  1. 1. varsity-climbing starts next week!
  2. 6. our top prediction for Rihanna's future child's name
  3. 7. not the school of the past or present but the school of the ______
  4. 8. the bus that splashes MMT students on 84th street
  5. 9. the questionnaire we get spam texts and emails from every morning
Down
  1. 2. the best mascot every who would totally win in a boxing match with a Sacred Heart Cardinal
  2. 3. first name of the Taylor Swift ex-boyfriend attacked by MMT students
  3. 4. keep doing this if you find an occupied bathroom
  4. 5. the grade who couldn't decide between Christmas colors for their class color
  5. 7. stop ordering ______ deliveries to the school!