The Potty Puzzler

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Across
  1. 1. Slang for toilet. Named after a real bloke. Seriously.
  2. 3. What you pray for after curry.
  3. 5. Fancy bottom bath. Mostly misunderstood by Brits.
  4. 7. TWO The polite code. Even posh people poo.
  5. 9. Formal. Pretentious. Still where you go to drop the kids off.
  6. 10. Not a swamp. Not posh. Just where you read shampoo bottles in peace.
  7. 13. Royal term for a very undignified seat.
Down
  1. 1. Historical toilet bowl. Usually under the bed. Occasionally in it.
  2. 2. Ye olde toilet. Smelt of history...and pee.
  3. 4. A haunting remnant. Proof that wiping technique matters.
  4. 6. Australian for “loo”. May contain spiders, shame, or both.
  5. 8. ROLL Britain’s most fought-over item in a crisis.
  6. 9. Three-letter miracle that separates us from the animals.
  7. 11. Old cry meaning "heads up — incoming turds!"
  8. 12. Where sewage dreams go to die. Also used to describe bad relationships.